I have had the WORST birthdays since I think I was 13 years old. When I was turning 13 I remember falling asleep in the back of my mom's car and she had my Aunt Dorthie up front and I remember my mom talking to my aunt and something brought up July 4th I assume? anyway mom said OMG! I forgot Sharon's birthday to which I do not remember my aunt sayting anything? I was awake but laid there on the back seat pretending to still be asleep and I remember a tear falling from my eye. I could not believe my selfish self centered mother had forgotten my birthday, maybe it was my 14th one I can't remember now because I can't remember having a good one in so many years I can hardly remember which one she forgot and which were just not important?
I never said a word to her I went home into my room and hugged my huge white bunny and cried like I did most nights I can remember and I never said a word I just remember the pain I felt in my stomach and how much it hurt.
Well this year many years later is no exception to my mother's self centered attitude toward MY BIRTHDAY! she as always has yelled, screamed and played the victim until I am so sick of it I wish she would just DIE and do me a favor!
She first asked what food I wanted and I said barbeque chicken, at which she declared she did NOT know how to cook and to tell MY HUSBAND TO DO IT! Ok I said and then she went on to complain how she hated my father and how she wanted to blow her brains out and she was at her ropes end, and I said " Well LET GO THEN" and Fuck the chicken, YOU don't have to bother with it or me or my birthday and she hung up on me! I was glad to be rid of her!
She not only hurt my feelings she brought back all the nasty feelings of how much I had felt unloved and unwanted and just a nusiance my entire life! I cried I tried not to and I prayed and prayed but no one really has any idea of the HELL I have endured with that BITCH all my life and death for her if that is what she wants will be welcomed by all!
I have been through so much Hell I can hardly tell you all of it in one blog, it will take many but I hope and I pray that someone out there is reading this and I hope you feel someone else has felt the pain you have endured because I spent so many nights feeling so alone and so lost but now I have GOD and believe me it took me a long time to get here but I won't EVER leave his side for anyone and I do mean anyone! I love the Lord I feel like I am loved and he kept me here through all this for some greater purpose and he is the only reason I carry on because he gave me this life to LIVE and to be HAPPY and I intend to do what MY FATHER WANTS FOR ME my REAL FATHER loves me no matter how my earth parents treat me they no longer matter to me just like no one else matters to me!
People can't hurt you or harm you or even bring you down if you have GOD I truly know I don't need anyone or anything else!
Saturday, July 2, 2011
Saturday, June 11, 2011
Parents Who are So into their kids
I don't think I had the kind of parents I have witnessed as an adult, the kind who take endless pictures of their kids and post them on every site they have until they have over exposed them to the point of making the rest of us want to PUKE!
My parents only took photos on special occasions and that was about it.
I remember being five years old and I was in a fashion show at my church and I was the best little model, I did not cry or complain one time I endured the changing of outfits and walking down a heavy lighted runway that I could not see anyone in the audience from. But I went on and did a great job while other children screamed and cried and acted like spoiled brats. The one thing I do remember is that my father supposedly forgot to bring the camera and well you probably know by now where this is going?
My parents took NO PICTURES of me, one of my relatives took ONE picture of me on the runway that was it, that is all I have to remember that really important moment in my little sad life!
Sad isn't it? It makes me feel how unimportant me and everything I ever did was to my parents.
To see all these parents who put all their money, effort and everything into their kids makes me feel sick to my stomach because I can't understand why I was so unimportant and while I did many great things as a child they all went unnoticed and unnoted and never recorded for anyone to ever see or know about and yet all these spoiled brats of today who do NOTHING interesting or great in my eyes get so much attention you would think they are all Einsteins or something?
It is sad but I know I am not the only child who was disregarded growing up and overlooked and made to feel like nothing, growing up with low self esteem and lacking in confidence!
I want all these parents who over indulge their children and take hundreds of pictures and post them for the world to admire them, WE DON'T! ONLY YOU care about YOUR kids!
Your kids are only GREAT to YOU! They do NOT impress me with their nothingness they do not outshine those who came before them and they probably will just grow up to be worthless selfish self centered spoiled BRATS who expect everything to be handed to them because that is how most of these kids who are very OVER EXPOSED are treated!
I know these parents I see them they hand their two year old everything when they throw a fit and their children maybe special to them and that is fine but STOP expecting the rest of the world to admire your Spoiled BRATS!
Sorry NOT impressed!
Now don't get me wrong there are indeed exceptional children in this world but the unfortunate fact is that most of them are poor or being raised by pathetic people, they are struggling to survive and be noticed, while the Over exposed Spoiled Brats of the world are lacking in talent and are selfish self centered will grow up to be NOTHING! This is indeed a Sad World we live in!
Those who deserve recognition may never get it while those who DESERVE NOTHING will get everything!
My parents only took photos on special occasions and that was about it.
I remember being five years old and I was in a fashion show at my church and I was the best little model, I did not cry or complain one time I endured the changing of outfits and walking down a heavy lighted runway that I could not see anyone in the audience from. But I went on and did a great job while other children screamed and cried and acted like spoiled brats. The one thing I do remember is that my father supposedly forgot to bring the camera and well you probably know by now where this is going?
My parents took NO PICTURES of me, one of my relatives took ONE picture of me on the runway that was it, that is all I have to remember that really important moment in my little sad life!
Sad isn't it? It makes me feel how unimportant me and everything I ever did was to my parents.
To see all these parents who put all their money, effort and everything into their kids makes me feel sick to my stomach because I can't understand why I was so unimportant and while I did many great things as a child they all went unnoticed and unnoted and never recorded for anyone to ever see or know about and yet all these spoiled brats of today who do NOTHING interesting or great in my eyes get so much attention you would think they are all Einsteins or something?
It is sad but I know I am not the only child who was disregarded growing up and overlooked and made to feel like nothing, growing up with low self esteem and lacking in confidence!
I want all these parents who over indulge their children and take hundreds of pictures and post them for the world to admire them, WE DON'T! ONLY YOU care about YOUR kids!
Your kids are only GREAT to YOU! They do NOT impress me with their nothingness they do not outshine those who came before them and they probably will just grow up to be worthless selfish self centered spoiled BRATS who expect everything to be handed to them because that is how most of these kids who are very OVER EXPOSED are treated!
I know these parents I see them they hand their two year old everything when they throw a fit and their children maybe special to them and that is fine but STOP expecting the rest of the world to admire your Spoiled BRATS!
Sorry NOT impressed!
Now don't get me wrong there are indeed exceptional children in this world but the unfortunate fact is that most of them are poor or being raised by pathetic people, they are struggling to survive and be noticed, while the Over exposed Spoiled Brats of the world are lacking in talent and are selfish self centered will grow up to be NOTHING! This is indeed a Sad World we live in!
Those who deserve recognition may never get it while those who DESERVE NOTHING will get everything!
Friday, June 10, 2011
Mothers who use their children to get back at their fathers!
My mother used me when I was a child to get back at my father constantly. She would get mad accuse him of cheating and literally take me out of my bed when I was sleeping and leave. We would go to a friend's house, hotels, cousins, all over the place. This was very disturbing to me as a child because children need stability and my mother was obviously very unstable and yet again very SELFISH!
I remember her taking me to some fleabag hotel in town and telling me I could not go outside because she did not want my father to see me? YET, she went outside and sat at a table talking the hotel manager man for hours while I was stuck in this nasty fleabag hotel room that was so nasty she would not even let me sit on the toilet.
I was distraught, I wanted to go home, I wanted my father and I started to despise her more and more.
The more my mother drug me from place to place the more I hated her. I told her once to leave me to let me stay home, after all I had a father and an older brother I did NOT need her! But NO! And now I know why she was USING ME to get back at my father.
I wonder if she knows just how much I despise her for what she did to me? I started to do badly at school, I also lashed out and did not know why? The truth was I was upset all the time and never knew when this bitch of a mother would be dragging me off on her next excursion, it was horrific for me to live through, I felt I had no control of my own life I after all was a child and this person who was supposed to protect me and give me a stable environment had done just the opposite, she had taken my stability and my family away from me and I hated her for it!
I have told her now that I am an adult what she did to me but she has yet to take blame for her actions, she says sarcastically "Well I AM SORRY I WAS SUCH A BAD MOTHER" !!! Well guess what Mom? YOU WERE not a BAD Mother YOU WERE AWFUL!
I remember her taking me to some fleabag hotel in town and telling me I could not go outside because she did not want my father to see me? YET, she went outside and sat at a table talking the hotel manager man for hours while I was stuck in this nasty fleabag hotel room that was so nasty she would not even let me sit on the toilet.
I was distraught, I wanted to go home, I wanted my father and I started to despise her more and more.
The more my mother drug me from place to place the more I hated her. I told her once to leave me to let me stay home, after all I had a father and an older brother I did NOT need her! But NO! And now I know why she was USING ME to get back at my father.
I wonder if she knows just how much I despise her for what she did to me? I started to do badly at school, I also lashed out and did not know why? The truth was I was upset all the time and never knew when this bitch of a mother would be dragging me off on her next excursion, it was horrific for me to live through, I felt I had no control of my own life I after all was a child and this person who was supposed to protect me and give me a stable environment had done just the opposite, she had taken my stability and my family away from me and I hated her for it!
I have told her now that I am an adult what she did to me but she has yet to take blame for her actions, she says sarcastically "Well I AM SORRY I WAS SUCH A BAD MOTHER" !!! Well guess what Mom? YOU WERE not a BAD Mother YOU WERE AWFUL!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
